Monthly Archives: September 2014

The cost of raising children

I’ve noticed an article making its rounds on my Facebook circuit that claims that raising children these days costs around 10 billion dollars per child per year! Ok, perhaps I am exaggerating the findings of the article a bit, but I don’t think I am overstating the despondency toward having children the article made people reading it feel.

First of all, all of the major cost factors the article pointed to were typical first world problems. Yes, it is ridiculously expensive to have the finest day care, private education, clothing, cars, organic farm fresh food, newest amusements, and for each child to have their own bedroom and bathroom. However, if you are your typical American two income, middle class family with 2-3 kids, you are deliberately choosing for your children to have these things that would be considered luxuries in the rest of the world because you want them to have nice things and can afford to do it for them. However, it is by no means necessary for successful child rearing. For those of us who decide not to go that route, we are perfectly content with children sharing rooms and bathrooms, one parent staying at home with the babies, cutting coupons and shopping sales at the grocery store, shopping consignment, the children getting jobs and having to work for it if they want to buy nice things, and homeschooling or using the local public school (if it is any good). read more

Captain’s Log: The Pestilence Continues

September 27, 2014

The pestilence continues without abatement on the good ship Bass. The stomach virus is a cruel mistress. ‘Twas the night before last she claimed her third victim. I was awoken from a deep slumber by the telltale sounds of gagging and coughing in the wee hours of the morning. I ran into the bunk of crew member Rose to find exactly what I had hoped not to find. I prepared to swab the deck yet again while the Captain took Rose to be hosed off.

We have placed ourselves under Quarantine and are currently living as hermits abstaining from the pleasures of a social existence. We earnestly pray that this Plague be lifted from our ship soon, and that our littlest crew member be spared. read more

How to leave the house with littles

One of my dear readers asked me to write a post on what I typically do to wrangle my three little ones when we are out and about. Your wish is my command!

Without further ado, my tips on leaving the house with multiple beings who have trouble moving under their own steam:

1) Give yourself plenty of time before you leave to get everyone ready, and then expect to still be late. I am fortunate to have VERY patient mommy friends who don’t sweat it when I am late. I had one very lovely mom who waited for me for HOURS and I had my mom helping me that day! I can’t help but notice we never had another play date after that disaster . . . . . Anyway, it takes a lot of time to get littles dressed and fed and pack the diaper bag and load everyone in the car. And then inevitably at least two of them will poop their pants. Begin the process over. read more

A Black Plague Themed Birthday Party

Ruthie had her third birthday party yesterday. If you were hoping for gorgeous pictures of Martha Stewart-worthy handmade decorations and a charming theme like, “Voyage to Paris,” well . . . . sorry. I think I must be the least crafty girl on the planet. When I was in high school, my 12 year old sister accused me of making people’s birthdays worse with my abysmal “happy birthday” posters. I was forced to agree.

Anyway, when I asked Ruth what kind of birthday party she wanted, she gave me two criteria: a bouncy house and an Ariel cake. That I can do, little curly top.
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Happy Birthday to Rue!

Dear Ruthie-

This day three years ago, your father and I were nervously driving at the crack of dawn to the hospital. We couldn’t believe it was time to meet you already. You had been stubbornly breech for most of my pregnancy, and with my low amniotic fluid and my tiny first time belly, it was going to be much safer for you to enter the world via a scheduled C section. I remember your large head was wedged up in my lungs and your little feet were up by your head poking me under my rib cage. read more

A Series of Unfortunate Events

Whenever I meet a mom and she finds out that I have three under three (I’m not going to be able to say that starting tomorrow!), her first comment to me is always, “But you look so calm!” Thanks? Not sure how I’m supposed to look. Perpetually wild eyed, gritting my teeth, and a nervous tick? Don’t get me wrong, having three children a year from each other is difficult, but it doesn’t seem to be giving me mental problems. Heck, mothers used to do it all the time, with a lot fewer conveniences than we have today. read more

Wren: 8 months

I feel like the difference from 7 months to 8 months is huge! My husband said, “she is finally getting fun!” I have found that men don’t have as much of an appreciation for the subtle joys of sleeping infants. They tend to be drawn to the more mobile giggling babies. Go figure.
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Thumb suckers unite!

Milestones: You started clapping! It is ridiculously adorable. You involve your whole body in this new activity. Sometimes the sheer energy of your clap topples you over! You are also finally sitting up steadily. I thought this would never happen. You have been babbling and gurgling up a storm. If someone blows raspberries at you, you blow them back! My grandmother said I’m going to jinx it by saying this, but you started sleeping 12 hours again! Right after you started sleeping through at seven months, you had your ER trip, horrible fever, and started teething hardcore, and started waking once a night again. Pobresita! You also had your first little tooth break through the gum! This is my first experience breastfeeding a baby with teeth, and ouch! You haven’t started army crawling yet, but you can roll across the room in the blink of an eye. You also FINALLY started drinking out of a bottle! Cue the Alleluia Chorus. read more

Happy 30th, Daddy!

I am in the midst of a pre-party FREAK OUT because Ruthie’s birthday party is on Saturday and my house looks like, you know, two toddlers and an infant live in it. Not to mention Scott’s twin (yes, my husband is a twin!) and his family are staying with us this weekend, so the guest bedrooms and bathroom must be prepared as well. The girls always have a blast with their little cousins, though, and Scott and I enjoy having some adult friends to hang out with too! I am so excited about both the party and the twin-laws coming to stay, but there is just so much that needs to be done! read more

Improvements to our humble abode

I never knew it while we were renting, but my husband is a home improvement freak! He is happiest every weekend if it is spent at Home Depot and then at home absorbed in one home improvement project or another. His latest project has been our yard. Curb appeal was always at the top of his list when we were looking for a home to buy. He said he could not bear coming home to an ugly house every day. It would depress him. Fair enough!

We bought our house, which I think is just beautiful. It had been vacant for nine months, though, so the yard had a very neglected look to it. The first thing my husband decided to tackle was the enormous trees in our front yard obscuring the view of our house and posing a danger to our girls’ rooms to boot. We removed 15 (that’s right, 15!!!!) trees from our front yard. Here is the before and after picture:
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The Weight of Worry

My mom always says you are only as happy as your least happy child. I would like to add that you also worry for your children way more than they could ever worry about themselves. I know that worrying is life sucking and counter productive, but I have been struggling with it a lot lately.

Before I had children, not much weighed on my mind. Nothing really caused me to have crippling anxiety. Not even trying to get through law school and pass the bar. Once I started having children, I have become a huge bundle of nerves. read more