Weekend Happenings

Is it just me, or do weekends fly by? You wait all week for the weekend, and then when it is finally here, you blink and it’s Sunday night again. Sigh.

My mom and I took the girls to Pike’s Nursery on Friday. I figured the girls would love seeing all the flowers, butterflies, bees, and birds. It did not disappoint.
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We also had a baby bird friend on our cart that we thought might accompany us the whole trip, but it balked when Rosie decided to cup it in her hands. Toddlers aren’t known for their reserve when it comes to touching small animals. read more

You Might Be a Catholic Mama If . . .

1) You are consistently frustrated that no one makes “Big Brother/Big Sister” baby onesies.

2) Going to mass is like preparing for battle. You must be armed with distracting yet quiet yet religious toys. And you still haven’t been able to pay attention to a whole mass in years.

3) You attend your children’s baptisms in a fairly large dress because you’ll be damned if you’re still wearing a maternity one.

4) You have more maternity clothing than normal clothing. read more

Wren: Seven Months

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Dear Wren,

What the what?!! You are seven months already. Boy, does the third baby age quickly. Before I know it, you will be fighting with Daddy about whether your outfits are too revealing or not. You might as well give up on that, by the way. By the time he gets to you, he will be an old pro at sending girls back upstairs to change because he will have already been doing it for your two older sisters. Speaking of your sisters, they still never fail to make you smile and laugh. Rosie loves hugging you and holding your face while telling you to look at her. (Why? I don’t know. Toddlers are mysterious.) read more

Wren’s ER Visit

It was the day before my birthday, and my sister and I were having a lovely time playing with my babies out on the patio. I was holding Wren and I heard her gagging. I immediately turned her to face me and she started vomiting. I quickly turned her away from me as she continued throwing up. It finally seemed like there was nothing left and when I turned her back toward me she was deathly pale and her lips had turned blue. I cleaned her up and laid her down in the play pen and she fell asleep. If it had been one of my other children, I wouldn’t have thought anything of it. But because of Wren’s heart issue, I figured I should call her pediatrician. I would have called her cardiologist, but they close the office during lunch time, and it was noon. As soon as I told the nurse on the phone Wren had pulmonary arterial stenosis, she cut me off and said I needed to take her to the emergency room. “Are you sure?”, I said. I did not want to be the hysterical mom in the ER who is there because her child threw up. “Yes, take her in immediately,” the nurse said firmly.
IMG_8496.JPG Wren before drastically changing the course of our day read more

The Thing About Advice on Motherhood: Too many cooks!

A dear friend recently wrote to me asking what I do about all of the advice and opinions people inevitably give when they see you with young children. She is a single mom dedicating her life to her sweet child, and everyone “shoving their oar in”, as it were, is distracting her from her main purpose: caring for her child the best way she can. Not to mention, too many people rowing the boat in different directions will only serve to make sure the boat isn’t going anywhere. (Hey! That must be the purpose of the metaphor!) read more

Your Baby Hates Me

“Your baby hates me,” you proclaim as you hand her back to me, gingerly, as if she may spontaneously combust at any moment. I giggle awkwardly as I receive my child. I never know quite how to respond to that proclamation in the moment, as many times as I’ve heard it.

My baby doesn’t hate you. Please do not feel awkward and offended that she took one look at you and immediately the corners of her lips traveled downward and her eyes started welling up. It was nothing personal. She is still learning about this big bad world and social conventions might be a little beyond her ken at this point in her life. As far as I can tell, her whole world revolves around mama, daddy, and big sisters. Everyone else is strange and scary. She is too little to know any better. read more

What Students Remember Most About Teachers

My fifth grade teacher, Ms. Davis, was an exceptionally kind person who cared deeply for all of her students. I remember one morning in particular when I walked into school late one day due to a morning appointment. I saw Ms. Davis rushing down the hall in my direction. “Hi, Ms. Davis!”, I greeted her. She looked up at me, slowed down, gave me a quick hug and said, “Hi, sweetie!” She then continued rushing down the hall. What I found out later in the day (when she was conspicuous by her absence) was that she had been rushing down the hall that morning because she had just found out her son had been in a terrible car accident and she was rushing to the hospital. She ran down the hall with that terrible knowledge but still took the time to give that shy fifth grader a smile and a hug. I will never forget her. This is dedicated to all of my friends and family members whose noble vocation in life is to be a teacher. You may not know it, but even the smallest things you do can change lives for the better. read more

How I night weaned Wren without “crying it out”

After the longest seven months of my life, we finally have reached my favorite milestone: sleeping 12 hours straight. To you mamas who still nurse at night for longer than seven months, you are made of sterner stuff than I. I was losing my mind night nursing past three months. I was having a hard time carrying on conversations past five months. I kept wondering if whomever I was talking to was offended by the glassy look in my eye. By six months, I was the walking dead. I live in Atlanta, so I fit right in. But I desperately wanted to join the living. read more

Ear piercing? Yea or nay?

When our first girl was born, I wanted to pierce her ears right away. In the Cuban tradition, girls getting their ears pierced is not a big deal. Some hospitals in Latin America will pierce your newborn’s ears for you. I believe I got my ears pierced around the age of six when I asked for earrings. My mother’s father is a vascular surgeon, so he pierced his daughters’ ears.

Well, my husband absolutely couldn’t stomach the thought of intentionally causing his sweet baby girl any sort of pain for something as silly as aesthetics, so my plan to put little earrings in our newborn’s ears was put on hold. Now, she is almost three and asking for earrings. read more

Stop humiliating your kids on the internet

As with any of my advice posts, I write this because I am as guilty of this as anyone, specifically, over-share about my kids on a public forum. The thing we forget, especially if our kids are little, is that someday they will be old enough to read and see all that stuff that we posted about them. So if you take that into consideration and come to the conclusion that your child will be really embarrassed about it, you probably shouldn’t share it.

In a similar vein, don’t complain about your children over social media if it isn’t something you would announce in person to her sixth grade class. That might be an excessively high standard, since sixth grade girls are embarrassed about EVERYTHING, but perhaps a good thing to at least strive for. Also, coming from the perspective of struggling with infertility, it really makes it sound like you are taking your children for granted, whether you mean it that way or not. A good private vent to your mom friends can help air out that frustration to someone who has been there, and your kids will never know. (Not that I have ever done that, kids. You were always perfect angels). read more